While Miss Red is overly self-confident, Miss Blue believes she has no skills in anything. Hence, she’d rather spend her time at home, sleeping. reading, eating and watching movies than risking the disappointment she expects from any of her enterprises. She eats too much and doesn’t move enough, so you can picture how she looks.
Miss Red has many friends, but she never goes very deep into any relationship, however intense they might become, because she is too self-centered to develop genuine interest for someone. Also, commitment scares her: she remains single. Miss Blue, on the other hand, is a loner. Relationships in general are a source of anxiety for her.
She tends to cry a little bit while listenning to songs like I am a rock by Simon and Garfunkel when it goes: “I have no need for friendship, friendship causes pain, its laughter and its loving I disdain”. Miss Blue’s life is not all that bad though: she has a boyfriend. Lots of men want to protect the poor little thing for she makes them feel strong. She deperately needs her boyfriend’s shoulder to cry on when she fails or is disappointed with the world. The insecurity of singlehood would be overwhelming.
I saw Miss Red the other day, she was dancing around like a mad cat listening to M. Tamborine Man by Bob Dylan. She told me: “Don’t you like this song? The words are awesome! And then she was singing: ”Though you might hear laughin’, spinnin’, swingin’ madly across the sun; It’s not aimed at anyone, it’s just escapin’ on the run”.
They both smoke and drink, but for different reasons (apart from auto-destruction, they have that one in common). Miss Red just smokes for her health, if you don’t count Valium, it is the only socially acceptable way she found to relax a little bit. Drinking is part of her going out a lot and helps her loosing her inhibitions too. Miss Blue started smoking to have something to count on when she feels down. It’s easy enough to become addicted to the cigarette that will always be here to comfort you. The drinking temporarily mellows the constant flow of negative thoughts popping in her head.
I know them both too well because they cohabit inside of my head. They never hang out together but they sure drive me crazy. Miss Red is noisy and bothers me at night when I try to sleep. She wants me to stay awake to analyse the whole world. Miss blue’s colour is spreading in the atmosphere all around her like a contagious disease, and so is her insecurity. Sometimes, their voices are so insistant that I confuse my own personality with one of them; until the other one takes over.
But hey, I’m stronger than them and keep them quiet most of the time. I hate them both, but they won’t leave me alone. So at one point in my life, I decided to try to have a good relationship with them instead of just shutting them down. From time to time, I visit Miss Red and try to persuade her to calm down and enjoy little pleasures everyday life has to offer. I reassure her she is great and doesn’t need to do everything perfectly. I need her to get some balance in her life because she exhausts me. Then I visit Miss Blue, cheer her up and get her out of her negative cloud.
Eventually, on a good day, Miss Red and Miss Blue beautifully melt together (in a non sexual way of course) into an intense purple. When it happens, they don’t bother me anymore. We are all made from different colours; like painters, we try to create a personality out of them. Sometimes they melt in an ugly way and create a big mess that takes a long time to clean up (imagine mixing brown and green for example). After a bit more practice though, the colours might go to the right place and turn into a harmonious, rich personality. It’s not crazy anymore, it is artistic.
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